My simple review of “New Moon”
It’s been over a month since I saw the movie but…
Holy shit, Edward! Are weight benches like stakes to the heart or something? From one out of shape skinny bitch to another, you need some sun and a gym membership. You’re competition is Jacob, and shit, I’m a heterosexual male, and even I wanted to squeeze him. I think the girls will find those muscles more impressive than sparkley skin.
And Bella, get a fuckin shrink. Y’know, I’m on this shit called Cytalopram, you should maybe check it out.
Alice, even if you are prejudiced [or allegorically racist] against the wolves, keep doing what you’re doing sweet stuff.
